


A New Kind of Headache

by evieva



Series: Haikyuu!! Witch AU [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe, Boys Kissing, I honestly have no clue how to tag this, M/M, Magician!Bokuto, Mild Blood, Nudity, POV Third Person, SO GAY, Witch AU, Witch!Akaashi, Witchcraft, just a little
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-16
Updated: 2016-01-16
Packaged: 2018-05-14 06:23:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,207
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5732683
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/evieva/pseuds/evieva
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>So here it's told of a witch who goes by the name of Akaashi Keiji, who's dinner turns into much more than a satisfying meal. </p><p>Akaashi is a witch/he was planning to eat Bokuto but Bokuto changed his mind/v gay/v magic/v alternate universe</p>
            </blockquote>





	A New Kind of Headache

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so there's not much to say about this other than I have a lot of time on my hands at the moment, and I thought of this short bit and ONLY this bit out of the blue and I had to write it you know of course I did. This is ENTIRELY made up from the strange place that is my brain, so if something about it seems 'wrong' to you, it might be because I twisted the forms of magical beings a bit, but that's okay lmao
> 
> I'm actually rather pleased with how it turned out, and I hope you all enjoy it too! Maybe I'll do a little bit of a bonus chapter that includes the idea I had for witch!Kenma and cat servant!Kuroo--what cha think?
> 
> I'm getting a little ahead of myself now, but, anyway, please and enjoy!!

The _clunk clunk clunk_ of the large metal cage echoed through the darkness of the castle, followed closely by the rattling of chains and the groan of a man close to death. The winding stone staircase caught the edge of the cage with each step, ensuring there be no silence until they reached the top of the tower.

It only served to make Keiji’s head ache more and more. Everything about this part was loud, loud, _loud._ He should seriously considered hiring someone stronger than him to do this. Or maybe learn a levitation spell. He’d look into that when he reached his laboratory. For now, he had to focus his energy into getting there.

When the last _clunk, rattle_ of the end of the staircase sounded, Keiji sighed in relief of finally ending the damn near loudest hunt he’d ever gone on. He had had headaches before, but none so strong as this.

He clutched the side of his head before flinging the door to his lab open. He searched his shelves for a book of spells containing levitation. “Anti-gravity...no…hillock? Peh!” He placed the book back on the shelf and grabbed another. He flipped through it and finally produced a spell that looked like would work. He took out his wand, made of the ash of an old apple tree, and began to program the spell into it by chanting the incantation. The spell lit at the very tip of it, and when it was as bright as a star, Keiji stopped his chanting and closed the book. His ashen wand vibrated, seeming to be excited about having a new spell incorporated into it.

Keiji took a breath, and mimicked the movement meant to activate his new levitation spell. There were only a few spells he had put into his wand, most he did not have time to memorize himself. Wands were only used so much by warlocks and witches--there being only a set amount of spells to be placed within them. Memory is where they should be kept.

The large cage began to float into the room, and Keiji was pleased that the spell was working flawlessly.

When the cage hovered over where he wanted it, Keiji released the spell by reversing the movement of the wand.

The cage crashed to the ground emphatically, shaking the tower and scaring off a few bats that slept in rafters above. Keiji quickly turned back to the book shelf, and found the spell he used. “Levitate and... _smash!?_ ” Now he saw it was an offensive spell, used for combat. “‘Suggested uses: to lift large objects (rocks, buildings etc.) and crush prey with them…’” Keiji sighed, groaning audibly and running a tired hand over his face. He shook his head, wishing nothing more than to sleep this headache away, when he heard the groaning from the cage again. His eyes shot towards the noise, wanted to pierce the sound away with just the look.

Keiji flipped his cloak from his pathway and approached the cage. He yanked the blanket from overtop of it, and finally saw what was making all the noise. A young man, no older than he, with spiky black and white hair, and handsome golden eyes stared up at him; awake and alive.

“You,” Keiji pointed, angrily, “You are supposed to be dead already.”

The man in the cage only yawned, sleepily looking at his surroundings, then back at Keiji. “Where...am I?”

Keiji did not answer that. He walked to his pantry, and pulled out potions for a brew; goblin water, magpie tongue, mint. Though he seemed to be missing something from his pantry. He’d have to go down to his basement to get it.

“Hey, wait a sec! Where are you going?” The man reached out from the bars of his cage for Keiji, but the witch ignored him. He shut the laboratory door behind him and began to descend the long winding staircase again. This time, silently.

 

* * *

 

 

The door to the basement creaked open, and, as he did every time he found himself down there, he remarked at how dark it actually was deep down in his castle. It was as though nothing but the darkness existed. How quaint it was for his headache, but it wasn’t helpful for what he needed to do.

Keiji waved his hand, reciting a light spell he memorized and released little star-like lights from the tips of his fingers. They illuminated the area softly, and Keiji motioned for them to follow him to the shelf of ingredients he kept there. He searched the shelves, when he finally spotted the last jar of cobweb oil. He was glad he at least had one left. This oil was very hard to find, expensive to buy, and exceptionally difficult to collect.

He retrieved it, then turned to leave the basement when he spotted something else; eyes of an owl. He blinked a moment, remembering the friend that have them to him. He spoke of a transformation spell. A potion that would only work once, for those eyes were bewitched with the sight of death. A rare occurrence for an owl. Keiji often wondered how Kuroo got such a thing.

Without thinking, Keiji grabbed the jar in which these special eyes swam and made his way out.

 

* * *

 

 

The door creaked shut behind him, and to his annoyance, it wasn't his headache-delusional brain that made the man in the cage appear alive, and speak. The man sat up straight at the sight of the witch returning to his laboratory, and Keiji noticed his hair practically fluffing up.

“U-um, hi,” He said, uselessly. Keiji ignored him, returning to his pantry and placing the owl eyes on the third shelf. “I was j-just wondering...about what you said about me being dead?”

Keiji turned, peering at him under the hood of his cloak.

“Is that true?”

The witch rolled his eyes, and turned back to what he was doing, ignoring the man in the cage. He began pouring goblin water into the prepared mortar and pestle bowl, just a few drops. “Goblin water saps strength…” He stated, almost to no one. He used tweezers to remove a single magpie tongue from the jar. He smashed it into the water. “Magpie tongue galvanize hunger…”

“‘Magpie...tongue..’?” A wary voice questioned.

Next, Keiji removed the dropper from the bottle of cobweb oil, again ignoring the man's questioning. “Cobweb oil to disable movement. And…” Finally, he took the mint leaves he brought out, and joined it with the rest of the mixture. “Mint for taste.”

“So, what's all this for anyway?” Keiji jumped, for the man’s voice was suddenly right behind him. He whirled, throwing a hand out and casting the Invisible Hand defense spell that went directly for his throat, as it was supposed to.

The fluffy haired man slammed against the cobblestone wall with a grunt. “How did you get out?” Keiji hissed threateningly, yanking the hood of his cloak off.

The man gazed upon Keiji’s face with wonder for a moment, then cleared his throat. “Uh, magician…” He pointed a finger at himself, like it was obvious. “Bokuto Koutarou; magician extraordinaire.”

“I've never heard of you…” He growled back.

“Obviously, cause, you would've made a better cage.” Bokuto smiled, despite the invisible grip around his throat tightening. Keiji’s head pounded in anger, his headache coming back with a vengeance. He furrowed his brow, and reached for the concoction he’d made. He held it up to the man’s lips.

“Drink.” He demanded.

“Um, I don't think I wanna.”

“You have no choice.”

“How about cards instead?” Bokuto flicked his wrist, producing a deck of cards out of thin air.

Keiji released his grip, and stepped back in surprise. “You're…a conjurer?”

The salt and pepper haired man raised a thick eyebrow, rubbing his throat. “Yes..?” He said, carefully.

“What else can you conjure?”

“Ah, a magician never reveals his secrets too soon. The shows just begun.” He grinned, shuffling the cards. “Now, shall we play?”

Keiji looked between Bokuto’s face and the cards in his hands. His headache finding an exit as thoughtfulness entered. He was curious about the undetectable power this man seemed to possess. For if he were a conjurer, then that would mean he was powerful. More powerful the even Keiji, possibly. He blinked calmly. “I only know one game.”

“That's fine--got a table or anything like that?” The magician glanced around the room. Keiji simply sat on the ground. “Oh, that's fine too.”

Keiji eyed the man carefully as he settled on the floor, thoughts flying through his brain the way bats hunted insects. Capturing a magical being as next-level as Bokuto _could_ put Keiji in a lot of danger. Best to appease him first, then let him go. He had heard of his lot conjuring things as extreme as dragons. He wanted to test how powerful this Bokuto Koutarou really was.

“So, what game do you know? I can teach you some, if you'd like.” Bokuto explained.

“That'll be fine.” Keiji responded.

Bokuto flipped the cards around in his hands, thinking about which game he wanted to play. “How about Blackjack?”

Keiji only blinked at him.

“Don't know it, huh? Alright, well, lucky for you it's very simple. The objective is to get 21 points--cards from 2 to 10 are worth face value. Jacks, Kings, and Queens are worth 10, and aces can be used for either 1 or 11.” Bokuto stopped shuffling to look the witch in the eye. “Easy enough, right? Just keep drawing cards and discarding cards until you reach 21 points.” He dealt two cards for Keiji and he picked them up and looked at them.

10 and an ace…

“What happens if you reach 21?”

“Oh, that's simple. Slam your cards down and you win.”

Keiji slammed his cards down on the floor swiftly, causing Bokuto to yelp and jump.

“Uhh...maybe not _slam…_ ” The magician looked over the cards curiously. “Woah! You _did_ win…”

“Yes…”

“Uhh, lucky draw, let's go again.” Bokuto collected the cards begrudgingly. Keiji watched him as he shuffled the cards, his actions showing somewhat of an annoyance.

“Did I anger you?” He asked, softly.

Bokuto looked up into his eyes, and Keiji could've sworn that, in the dim light, a color erupted on his cheeks. Something strange was going on here. “No, no, not at all.” Keiji relaxed his shoulders in relief at those words.

“By the way, what were you planning on doing with me? I-if I had actually died, that is.” Keiji raised his eyebrows.

“I was just going to eat you.”

“Oh,” he chuckled a bit, “I-is that all?”

“Yes.”

“Is that you're usual diet?”

Keiji looked at him, eyebrows furrowed, “Isn't that yours? You are a conjurer—you tell me.”

Bokuto laughed at this, dealing the cards once more. “Yes, yes of course. How silly of me.”

Keiji thought his actions strange. Conjurer’s don't usually act this way. Then again, Keiji had yet to _meet_ a conjurer. Maybe they were all this unusual and listless. Appearing to be unintimidating when in reality they could tear you apart in a glance.

“Aha! 21!” Bokuto laid his cards down, showing a 5, 6, and an ace. Keiji looked back up, wondering, perhaps, if he was joking.

“Bokuto-san--I think you need to count again.” He pointed to the cards lazily, lidding his eyes half-way as though he were thinking.

The magician looked down again, recounting his cards, then gasped.

“That’s—22…” He chuckled lightly, taking up his cards once more.

No. Something was definitely wrong.

“Bokuto-san...what else can you conjure, besides cards?” Keiji asked, tilting his head inquisitively as he took another card.

“Money.”

“Really? That's amazing.”

“Wanna see?” He smiled, leaning closer to the witch. Keiji leaned back as Bokuto advanced, but there was no need. Bokuto flipped out a silver coin from behind Keiji’s ear. The witch unknowingly put a hand on his ear, as though it actually came from there.

Bokuto offered Keiji the coin, and he took it gently from his half-gloved fingertips. “Very...impressive…”

“Thank you.” He smiled happily. Keiji’s eyes flicked up and down his figure, looking for a sign—something that would give away his true power; his true person.

“I've heard of conjurer’s who have produced a beast from their person. Have you done anything so...extraordinary?”

“Huh, uh...well, I have... _conjured_ kittens before.” He drew another card and discarded it.

“So nothing…” Keiji looked over the card he drew, then flicked his gaze up as he said: “... _unbelievable?_ ”

“Well, I don't mean to brag but,” Bokuto shrugged, “I _am_ better than a buddy of mine.”

That settled it for Keiji.

He made a gesture with his hand and Bokuto suddenly stiffened, motionless. “What...a-are you doing..?”

“Calling your bluff. You are not what you say you are.”

“A-and why not?” He replied, his confidence fading quickly as he was hoisted to his feet.

“Conjurer’s do not associate with others. They don't have _buddies._ ” Keiji stood and picked up the bowl from his cabinet counter. “Drink.”

“Wait, wait, wait!” His eyes widened in fear of the bowl’s contents. “C-can't I just, you know, be in debt to you by servitude? I-instead of—” he gulped, “being eaten?”

Keiji was a bit taken aback by this. Other witches and warlocks basically inherited their servants, or captured them and forced them into servitude. He had never heard of someone _willingly_ give the rest of their life to a witch. He must be stupid.

“You're a fool, aren't you?” Keiji scrunches his face, “You do realize what you are pledging? A lifetime with me?”

“Well, I-I mean that doesn't sound so bad, cause,” he licked his lips, “being with someone a-as beautiful as you would be—” He paused, seeming to realize what he was saying.

Keiji squinted, “Is this another one of your... _tricks_?”

“No! No, no, no, no!” He laughed awkwardly. “I, I, uh...I really think so and...that seems like a _way_ better alternative than...dying..?”

Keiji considered this. “A body guard? A scavenger? A wench?”

“Yes, yes, all of that!” Bokuto nodded furiously.

Keiji snapped his fingers, and a fire lit beneath his large, black cauldron. He returned to his pantry, and reached for the top shelf, grasping a jar he didn't think he'd use so soon. He silently collected ingredients, making sure to concentrate on keeping Bokuto where he had captured him.

“U-um...so, do I have to sign something or..?” Keiji paused.

“In a way.” He said.

“O-oh...cause, I don't really know what...warlocks er... wizards do…” At this, the black-haired turned towards him.

“I am a witch.” Keiji stated.

“Oh, right, sorry uhh…”

Keiji sighed. This guy was obviously unfamiliar with the magical order. “Warlocks are similar to wizards. However, they dabble more in the darker, unknown sides of magic. Wizards use their magic willy-nilly, while warlocks actually try to _learn_ more about magic rather than using it.”

“What about witches?”

“Witches use magic for similar things, although our magic and spells are very different to that of warlocks.” Keiji returned to his work.

“What, like—different in language? Exclusive in...gender?”

Keiji rolled his head back to looked at Bokuto incredulously.

“Hey, if I'm gonna be in servitude for life, I'd at least like to know what I'm signing up for.”

Keiji turned his gaze away, ignoring what he could possibly mean by that, and finished what he was doing. “All in good time, Bokuto-san.”

The witch made his way over to the boiling water of the cauldron. He dumped the entire bottle of troll wax into it, and the cauldron responded with a fair bit of smoke. Keiji waved it away before adding chopped phoenix feathers and butterfly powder.

He turned to Bokuto. “I'll need your blood.”

“Wha—oh, uh, how much? Cause I'm not sure I'm comfortabl—”

“It's that or semen.” Keiji explained, “which are you more willing to give?”

Bokuto then turned bright red, spluttering as Keiji retrieved a knife and a drip pan. “B-blood would work b-better for me—I mean—it'd be m-more convenient for you, right?” He laughed lightly.

“It doesn't matter,” Keiji explained, and he could hear Bokuto swallow loudly. He then took hold of the magician’s hand and carefully cut a pattern into it. Bokuto only flinched a few times, but other than that, it went rather well.

“Squeeze the excess blood into this dish,” he ordered. Bokuto did, hissing a bit at the pain.

Keiji stepped up to the cauldron and dropped the blood in and, bit by bit, the concoction turned red.

“Woah…” Bokuto breathed behind him. Keiji turned to see what he was so impressed about, and saw him looking at his hand. The witch snapped the magician’s palm to where he could see it, and saw his witch inscription slowly healing the cut over.

“Signed.” Keiji stated simply. He shuffled over to his pantry once more and took up the eyes of an owl jar. He looked at them as they floated around in the syrupy liquid they resided in.

“What are those?”

Keiji did not respond. He unlatched the jar carefully, and reached with his fingers to grab one of the eyes. He examined it for a moment, then dropped it into the cauldron. It disappeared into steam and was followed shortly by its pair. When he was satisfied that it was properly mixed, he snapped his fingers again, and the fire went out.

“When it cools enough, you must bathe in it.” He explained.

“Is it like initiation or something like that?”

Keiji stared blankly at him, “Something like that...” He waved his hand and the grip around Bokuto disappeared. He stretched his arms and shoulders a bit.

“Oh, thanks I—”

“Get undressed.” Keiji commanded.

“O-okay…” Bokuto seemed reluctant to; as though Keiji would change his mind. But as the witch sat into a nearby wooden chair, leaning back, crossing his arms and legs, and seeming to have _no_ intention of changing the order, the magician obliged. Albeit slowly.

Keiji couldn't help but gloss over Bokuto’s bare chest, pleased to see no small amount of muscle bulging through his skin. He's strong. Good.

As he then moved to remove his pants, the witch’s eyes got glued to his arms. They were rather impressive.

Keiji stood, holding a hand up for Bokuto to pause. He froze as Keiji ran his hands over the magician’s biceps, feeling goosebumps erupt on Bokuto’s skin. Keiji glanced up with his eyes to see the man’s expression, and he wasn't looking at him. “So you say you are a magician, hm? What kind of training does that take?”

Bokuto stuttered for a bit, not seeming able to form a sentence as Keiji circled him, checking off a list of good features. “I-it's uh—it can get kind of hard sometimes. Finding work and money is hard too.”

“Oh? How so?” Keiji looked into Bokuto's large, beautiful eyes and, once again, the man couldn't find words. “Never mind it then. Finish disrobing and get in the bath. We haven't got all night.”

“W-we don't? I-I mean, yes, of course.” He pulled his pants down. “We have other ‘witchy’ business to attend to!”

Keiji hummed, returning to his seat. He watched Bokuto draw nearer to the cauldron.

“This isn't gonna hurt, is it?”

Keiji shrugged, scanning Bokuto’s body. “I haven't tried it myself. I do not know.”

“Uh, okay…” The magician took a deep breath and mumbled to himself about it being better than getting eaten. He swung a leg over the edge which was followed awkwardly by the second. “Oh, this isn't so bad...what’s in this? Earwax?”

“Troll wax.” The witch corrected, absentmindedly. He could not, for whatever reason, take his eyes off of Bokuto’s chest.

“Yeah, gross…okay.” He slowly lowered himself until his chest was submerged then stopped. “Is...it working?”

Keiji stood and removed his cape, finding the room to be a bit balmier than before (could be the cauldron). He stepped over so he could see into the cauldron when it started to glow. “Appears so.” He stepped back again as Bokuto began to melt into it.

“O-oh my goodness, okay, okay, okay…” He kept repeating in a panic as his hands swirled into the water.

“Just relax, it will be over before you know it.” The black-haired closed his eyes, doing his best to drown out Bokuto pleas for help.

When the room went silent for maybe too long, Keiji peeked an eye open, wondering if he had made the potion wrong. Then, suddenly, he heard bubbling within the pot and no sooner did something burst from within the pot's contents.

Bokuto, in his new form, gasped a deep breath of air, flying toward the ceiling. He hooted and hollered, seemingly unaware that he wasn't dead. “Bokuto-san...” Keiji said, quietly and happily. “It worked!”

“What worked?” He responded, then being so distracted his forgot to flap his new wings. He fell from his new height screaming, and Keiji caught him from below.

“You're an owl.”

“A what?”

“An owl.” Keiji restated.

“Forever!?” Bokuto tried to look down at himself.

“No. You can change back anytime you wish. You just have to learn.” The witch responded. He smiled softly, very pleased with his work. Bokuto lifted his legs and gripped onto Keiji’s sleeved arm, tentatively flapping his white/grey wings to steady himself. Keiji held him up to the broken mirror hanging on the wall so he could see.

“Aahh…” He mused, tilting his owl head as though testing it were actually himself. “Ooo…” He twisted his head around full circle, chuckling and widening his large eyes. “I've always wanted to try that.”

“I think you'll learn to like it.” Keiji explained.

“So do I.” Keiji could have sworn he was smiling. “Now how do I—” In a sudden puff of smoke, Bokuto’s naked, human form fell full force onto of Keiji. They landed with no small amount of grunts on the stone floor, and, due to no small amount of happenstance, their lips landed together in a small kiss. Bokuto parted their lips just as Keiji was starting to get used to it, laughing distractedly, as though that didn't just happen.

“Sorry, I didn't think it'd be so easy…” He grinned before _really_ realizing what had happened. He turned redder than pickled rabbit hearts.  “Oh, God, I'm _really_ sorry, master—may I call you master? I don't know your name yet and it's kind of weird not to call you anything and— oh my stars we totally just kissed, didn't we? I understand if you'll want to kill me now but ple—” Keiji held up a hand for him to stop, sitting up as his new assistant finally got off.

“Akaashi Keiji.” He replied simply, brushing the dirt and dust off of his clothes. “Just Akaashi will do.”

 

* * *

 

 

“Listen, I won't ever do that again…” Bokuto said, for the millionth time as he came back from his trip to the basement a few hours later.

Keiji sighed, “Like I've already told you, Bokuto-san—wave it from your mind.” He paused, thinking on it a moment as Bokuto carefully replaced a few empty jars with the new ones. “And...I wouldn't tell you to... _never_ do it again.”

Something was dropped onto the desk—a bottle, for Keiji heard it begin to roll around dully on the wood. He didn't look, but the witch knew his servant was staring baffled at him.

He smiled to himself, hoping Bokuto wouldn't see.

“Oh, so I see how it is—because I'm hot, you took mercy on me, is that it?” Keiji could hear the grin through his speech. He was concocting a stupid idea in his head, much similar to the potions the black-haired made.

“Not entirely.” Keiji responded carefully.

“Ah, but it's part of it!” Bokuto snapped his fingers, giggling giddily and he finished shelving the ingredients. “Oo, boy do you have the hots for me!” He teased, and Keiji rolled his eyes. He looked at the man as he easily placed bottles and jars on the higher shelf the witch could not reach with ease. He clapped his hands twice and in a puff of smoke, Bokuto hooted into his bird form.

He gestured with his fingers, a silent command for the bird to come to him. “Just a reminder—” Keiji said when Bokuto landed on his extended arm. “I have control over when and where you transform. And I can change you anywhere I wish. So don't have too much confidence in your...attractive form.”

Bokuto grumbled a bit, though he did not seem unhappy, as his large owl eyes moved almost comically in their sockets. He was suddenly reminded of the headache he had had earlier in the evening, and was very grateful it appeared in a different form. This cute, little owl would be his new headache, and Keiji was perfectly alright with that.

Keiji leaned forward, petting Bokuto’s now ruffled feathers down, and placed a kiss on his forehead. If owls could blush, Bokuto certainly had it down to an owly art.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading, don't forget to leave kudos and comments, and I'll see ya next time!!! Love and hugs! <3


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